Thursday, October 12, 2006

Anxiety...

I have dreams and passions.
Things that I want to do with my life.
I want to:
work in event planning (eventually open my own event planning business with KSD)
Act
write the script for my short
loose 80 lbs
get a new apartment
pay off my bills/get out of debt
Live my life like its golden!

But for some reason I get stalled and overwhelmed.
I do nothing.
I get nervous and ask myself: can I really do these things? Do I have the resources?
But I've started to realize that GOD has given me talents.

God Given talents:
I really like working and interacting with people.
I enjoy cooking and think I am pretty good at it. I am even interested in studying to get better.
Acting!
I have a great smile.
I honestly love customer service! I enjoy giving the customer what they need and even showing them options that they never considered.
I like to write.
I love to laugh, and think I have a great sense of humor.
I love children and interacting and working with them.


For the past couple of weeks I've been watching Christian TV in the morning.
I need the extra support & foundation to make it through my day.
This morning Zachery Tims said that God puts us through set backs and test so we can get ready for the BIG test.
he gave the example of David & Goliath.
David, while protecting his sheep, was faced with a lion and a bear. (2 separate occasions)
He managed to kill both animals.
When his people needed someone to slay Goliath, David remembered that God had helped him kill the other 2 animals, so he knew it wouldn't be a problem to kill Goliath.
So God had created situations where David trusted God & himself. He developed FAITH.
I have to remember things that God brought me through in the past.
HE isn't going to leave me now.

It just is scary and makes me uneasy because I am always thinking what if I put in tons of effort and it doesn't work.
Then what do I have.
Maybe I had something in the past that I put a lot of effort into and came up short.
But I keep coming up with good things that I worked hard at:

When I was on academic probation in Undergrad & then worked hard & made the Deans List every semester there after.

When I totally submitted to God's Plan & lost 70 lbs.

I have to come up with some others but those 2 were big for me!

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